September 2004

I tend to get philosophical and preachy but, that’s me. I love God. So sit on it.

…Soo bad…” Life, life is something we are all accustomed to and are all too quickly in a hurry to get to the end, in our youth but; once we reach a certain point, we cling to it like a child to his security blanket, afraid to let it go. I am not one of these individuals. This being said will most certainly explain most of my capricious acts which I commit on a daily basis. For example today, on my way back to my dorm I was almost seriously injured/killed when a driver in front of me decided to slam his brakes going 40 or so MPH, I was one centimeter from careening into the ass-end of his car. My steering wheel shifted itself all the way down to my knees, which was nice as being the fact I would have eaten it for lunch instead of the roasted chicken and cookies I had. After I made the amazing stop which was in lack of a better term: Divine intervention, I looked up and first thanked the Lord that, I didn’t die and secondly that my package was affixed to the left side of my trousers, as apposed to the latter (which would have been quite painful). The next thought popped into my head was: “man that could have been my ticket home.” I am not in a hurry to get home mind you, it would be nice to leave my troubles behind, it’s been a rough day but, after talking with Rachael tonight, I will thank God again for leaving me here in this land of toil. It’s odd to think that I (I am sure I am not the only one, I hope) worry more about the little, insignificant things in life like, a bad grade on a test rather than getting killed just a few hours ago. I leave you with the same thoughts I had tonight on this issue: “Therefore I say to you do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink; nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? “Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not more value than they? “Which of you by worrying can add one cubit to his stature?…Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” -Matthew 6:25-34 (NKJV) (Read the whole chapter)

To every cookie he meets he stays a stranger…” Mmmm, cookies, I just got back from the cafeteria on Alumni and to my surprise it is much better than the eateries on campus, a more intimate setting not to mention the food is better but, enough about cookies and roasted chicken, its time to get serious, serious about homework. I have a biach-load of it ranging from Japanese to Juvenile Justice Administration. Everything just piled up on me today, I got a poor grade on my Japanese test, I got woken up in the middle of the night and I have a raging headache like you would not believe…and I want to listen to the Doors but, my roommate is sleeping. I am going to follow suite in a moment and take a nap myself but, above all that God is good.

…Jack.



I was awoken at 5:40am to the sound of a horrid, screeching beast (or so I thought) instead of a Yeti, it was in fact the fire alarm. I smelled no smoke hence, I lay back down in bed and tried to ignore the bellows of this creature outside of my room but, I could not; unlike my roommate who happily told me he was going back to bed. I put on a jacket and hop, skipped and jumped to the nearest exit. I froze my Glory off out in the cold for thirty minutes, watching three fire engines pull in and three firemen to immerge and casually walk to the door, I prayed to myself that if there was a real fire they might decide to move a little faster. When we finally got to go back in it was 6:05 or so. I was going to get up at 7:00am. Damn. I got up this morning (yet again) about 10:00am and walked down to the Alumni dining hall (my check came in, so now I have a meal plan. Woo.) And no one was there so I swiped my card and walked in, this is when a little, old woman just stared me down and I mean an evil, ‘you touched my baby girl’s vittles and you’re going to pay, bitch’ look. I didn’t know what I did, I thought maybe because I was white, so I walked around and looked ( my first visit to the dining hall) and this little old lady yells “that part of the hall is closed”. “Ok.” I replied and sat down with my bagel and bowl of Coco Krispy’s, I finished my breakfast and decided to head out the door. This is when the little old lady demanded to see my ID, I presented it, just then another co-worker came out of the back and watched her, she told me that she needed to swipe it. I told her I had already done so because; no one was there to swipe my card. Just then the evil stare left her face and a glow that can only be described as a ‘O’ Honey come over here and give granny some sugar’ She thought I was an evil thief bent on getting a free bagel and bowl of cereal. Mercy, oh well, I need to study for my Japanese test, pray for me.

(This is one of my spiritual one’s…so if you don’t want to think about God, just don’t read any further.)



It’s 11:23pm and I just got off the phone with my best friend… aka the webmaster/ author of “The Life and Times of Gloryfish” Jason. I acquiesced to find out his ideals on, the fire I am metaphysically building via what he thinks about my particular struggles and tribulations I and he face on a daily basis. He responded the way I thought he would: “Go with God.” And indeed I find that answer to be most habitable. I have found as through most things in life the answers to everything is simple. We just, as human beings choose to say “no” that can’t be it, its too simple…Well Buddy…it is, so deal with it. Take for example how do we stop the spread of STD’s? Stop fucking around. See a simple answer, yet people around the world (ahem, the French) say “no that’s not the right answer, it’s too simple” “waa waa, I want to screw like a bunny on ecstasy.” As we can see class any question has a simple answer, you just don’t want to hear it. As the rules of exceptions come into play I want the whole class to understand there is no such thing as a stupid question and if any of you need to use the bathroom, make sure to take the pass. As I was saying there is an exception to almost every rule, so here are the exceptions: God and Love. I told you the answers are simple, it’s the questions that are hard to ask. My Glorious, I said if you had a question, just ask. *turns and looks around the class* Well, I guess if there are no questions you may leave. Does anyone feel like they are being preached at? Well, that means you’re smart. God feels the same way. Just ask. He has the answers, you may not like the answers but, you’ll have to admit, He’s right and remember: There are no stupid questions.

Wednesday: I finished my classes sleepily and headed down to Rachael’s house around 12:00pm and arrived at 3:00pm (no I did not get lost) it was Glorious. Rachael and I watched a movie or two, had lunch, Quentin woke up so we played around then, Rachael went to work. Sharon and Tim came home and we sat down and talked and Quentin and I watched Spongebob Squarepants till Rachael came home around 9:30pm. This is when I watched a movie I shall never see again: House of a Thousand Corpses. The first 30 minutes we fantastic then, the most bile one could ever see in a film. Ugh, needless to say I chose the next one after that (although Rachael promised me I would never have to see it again). Quentin fell asleep around 1:30am and I went to bed at 2:30am.

Thursday: I woke up on a bright and somewhat rainy day (around 10:30am or so) Tim was still home (he works around 11:00am or so) I jumped on Rachael and attempted to wake her up for about 15 minutes and proceeded to take her photo after she threatened to beat me. This was Rachael’s day off so, we went around town to Wal*Mart picked up some diapers for Quentin and got some tacos. Quentin and I had a ball reading, playing and watching the infamous Farscape (which is slowly becoming one of my favorite series of all time) around 7: oopm or so Rachael and I went on our “date” of the weekend. We had decided to go (or I did, I should just say I) to go mini-putting. We drove down to Corning to the putt, putt fun land but it was only open the weekends. So we drove around the back roads having a blast, talking and viewing the open country then came back to Horseheads and ate at: The Taste of China. This is a plug for the Taste of China because it is so Gloriously Glorious. We arrived about 35 minutes till closing (it had been around 5 years since Rachael had been for oriental food) so we ordered and had some delicious Oolong Tea (Remind me to pick up a box of it for Rachael) then we drove back and had a bitch of a time putting Quentin to bed, he fell asleep around 2:30am I was drifting in and out for that time watching Rose Red with her.

Friday: Rachael had to work till close this night so that meant she would not come back till around 9:45-10:20pm and Tim and Sharon went to go see an Evangelist at church. I am getting ahead of myself. I got up around 12:00, Rachael woke me up (first time) and we watched some Farscape and Quentin and I played around. Rachael left for work around 6:00 so it was I and Quentin alone, so we swapped manly stories and I gave him a bath and made dinner. Tim came home later in the evening and we to stayed up and swapped manly stories. Jon, Bekah, Chris and Jen came to the house around 9:30pm or so ate pizza and goofed around with Quentin and I and Rachael came home around 10:00pm and it was Glorious I took more pictures of her and I against her will and watched the conclusion of Rose Red. God is too good to me.

Saturday: I woke Rachael up around 11:30am or so but, before that Quentin and I were playing about the house…anywho…Rachael and I went to wal*mart I picked up deodorant and she picked up other thingies that she needed. We had some fun, came back home watched a movie or so and she went to work, I did my homework and took a nap. Tim and Sharon took me to go see the Evangelist this night; he was an amazing (Dylan’esk) harmonica playing Aussie with a good message. We went home afterward and Rachael soon followed a beautiful end to a Glorious day.

Sunday: I woke up at 10:30am and tried to wake up Rachael for roughly two hours. Made her coffee, she showered and had too leave o’ too soon, I miss her already. I changed and dressed Quentin, then later the family came home and we ate lunch and I drove home.

God is soo Good.

“As I walk though the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil for Thou art with me…” The verse pounded though my brain as I entered hell around 4:00pm this afternoon (Hell aka Binghamton, NY) I got back to a chilly Albany, NY Safe and sound.

My Blogg was mysteriously updated…

Thank You Jay, Jay Roberts (The Life and Times of Gloryfish) Glory! Anywho, it’s been a busy day I had classes from 10:15am straight till 2:35pm then I got a few hours break to drive though rush hour traffic, make a tuna sandwich and fly back to wonderful U Albany. Buy some gas and go to my THREE HOUR class on Hollywood and the Jews. I just bought the books for the class yesterday and we had a quiz. Woo. Afterwards, I was a little sleepy, I went to the campus Ambassadors meeting early for about 15 minutes and talked to some friends and drove back to the dorm. I sat back, relaxed and made myself ramen noodles (chicken, my favorite) and a microwave burrito. My Dad called a little later, it was nice we talked about the game, he told me my check came in and in that moment in which he told me the clouds rolled back and I heard angelic voices saying “It’s Here la la la its Here!” a tear came rolling down my cheek, then I blinked and the clouds rolled back together and my father said “Brian, are you there?” I said “Jesus?” My Father replied “Brian you know I don’t like to here that kind of talk.” After I finished my conversation I realized that I get to go see Rachel tomorrow. I am a blessed man. Pray for me though, because I like to exploit my blessings like a pimp whores his best call girl. OOOOh, Glory. Pray for me a lot.

#4 Does it again, oh that Farve!… Did anyone else see the Green Bay, Carolina game, my Glorious. Anywho my Japanese test was interesting, I think my grade will be even more so, I am not sure how I did but, I can assure you it wasn’t an A+. After the test I went down to the bookstore and picked up the rest of my textbooks, went to Edleez tobacco shop and got some McChyristal’s Violet snuff (mild but, a good chaser) went back to my dorm and did some homework, took a nap and watched some HBO movie, it was pretty good…it was about this little girl who was the child of a warped woman who is placed in different foster homes, very interesting it had Michelle Phipher in it. Anywho later on in the evening around 7:30pm or so I went back to the campus to go swimming, watched the Game and called my girlfriend she’s on new pain medication (and was quite fun to talk to) *funny girl when she’s loopy* I have a class at 10:15am tomorrow but, I am not tired yet. Pray for me.

If Life was supposedly meaningless as most atheists would agree too… at this moment I would have to disagree. There is meaning in every aspect of life as subtle as that may be, its still there. Whether it be the grass blowing in the soft breeze of an Albany afternoon or the single bovine grazing on the same grass one-hundred and fifty miles away in Peaslyville, I see it. I see it in everything, my Japanese professor shaking her head as she looks at my poor handwriting, to my girlfriend sarcastically agreeing with me that I can change her son’s diaper as he sleeps on his stomach. I see it. Even at my worst in life and at my best (which isn’t often) God is there and he is good, I know this isn’t my usual witty and somewhat informative tale I usually spin to make my friends laugh but, I have just been thinking today on how blessed I am, to be alive, to feel the east wind blow on me as I sit outside my downtown domicile, to smell the grass and yes even to change Quentin’s diaper (Rachel’s son) though all the trials and tribulations we go through in life, as much as I complain about the human condition we all face, everyday. I would just like to say, I see it and therefore I know I am blessed. As we all are. I’ve been a child, a junkie, a loner and a dead man but, I know that there is God and I know He knows it all, some would say then why would you believe in someone who would put you through all this, I’d reply He sent His only Son to do the same thing. So if you feel you’ve been having a bad day, week, month, year, and decade just think of how blessed you are to feel the wind blow, even if it blows on you in the Ghetto of Albany. As for you atheist’s, just think. That’s all.